Tuesday, 2 December 2014

How I became a Web Developer (Part 2/2)

Battle of the Bottle

And then, like many young people, I got carried away with the fact that I had money. I started drinking. It began as weekend binges, then trickled down to weekdays as well. Waking up with strangers, puking my guts out. That kind of thing. I started calling in sick. I could have still worked, I just didn't want to. It showed in my attitude. I became snarky, unhelpful and short-tempered.

Pretty soon, I was going through the motions at work and waiting for the monthly paycheck just so there would have money for booze. And of course, I needed money to drink because it helped me deal with how much I hated this job. If at this point, you're thinking that this sounds stupid, you're absolutely right. I was a stupid kid. I wasn't being fair to the company or myself, and this was definitely not how a responsible working adult should carry himself.

Yep, this loser.


One day all this came to a head.

The company presented me with a gift: a nice wristwatch engraved with my name, and a letter congratulating me for having completed five years in their employ. I'm sure they meant well, but it was like a slap in the face.

Five. Fucking. Years.

I was supposed to have been gone by the third year. What happened to the wildly ambitious twenty-three year old who stepped into this company five years ago? That kid got sidetracked. He got stuck in a job with precious few prospects, because, as technology advances and becomes increasingly ingrained into our daily lives, fewer users are dumb enough to need much desktop support anymore. That kid hated his job, so in the past few years he hadn't learned a damned thing about networking or server support. He basically followed orders and went through the motions. Meanwhile, his pay kept rising. Whereas once he was good value for money, he was now rapidly becoming an expensive liability.

This kid's relationship with this company was over. It was just a matter of who realized it first.

Epiphany

I got drunk again that night. The following morning, I looked in the mirror. My wasted unshaven face and bloodshot eyes stared back at me judgmentally. I'd run out of excuses. What was holding me back? Stagnating economy? IT employment squeeze? Bad timing?

Bullshit. I was the one holding myself back. My fate was in my hands, and always had been. And from that moment of clarity, came resolve. I still liked to drink, but I hated my job more than I liked to drink. And if I was tired of being treated like desktop support, the answer was simple. Stop being desktop support.

Action

From that day, I stopped drinking. No allowances, no excuses. And made a plan. To make myself employable somewhere else without having to leverage on years of desktop support experience, I would need a skill upgrade. Fortune favored me then. There was a polytechnic offering post-grad courses. After some careful deliberation, I enrolled for a course in e-commerce technology.

So now instead of drinking, I was spending my time after office hours studying, experimenting and doing research. A year later, I obtained my certification. Another company offered me a web developer's position, but at a pay cut. I took it without hesitation. And never looked back. I've stayed (mostly) dry since, and since that day I have never needed to call in sick.

That's how I finally became a web developer. I was earning less than before and had to start from the bottom, but I was free.

Was it smooth sailing from then on? Oh hell, no. This was just the beginning. There was a looming mountain in front of me and a journey that promised to be rough and treacherous. I dug in and started climbing.


Just the beginning, kiddo.

What's the point of this story? 

To congratulate myself on a job well done? To make a big song and dance about my personal and professional journey?

Well, I'd be lying if I told you I don't have a healthy amount of self-esteem from having clawed my way out of that pit. Sure, there are stories out there way more amazing, and struggles way more epic than mine. And I wouldn't be the first person in the world to wake up one day, stop drinking, and take control of his life.

But it's my blog. It's my experience. I get to tell my tale, and if you get something out of this as well, good for you.

If there's anyone out there who's at a vastly different place than you envisioned yourself to be and are feeling dissatisfied with life, perhaps this will help you reach the same realizations. With far less fuss.

Sometimes the answer really is that simple - stop whining and move on. And if you're telling me it isn't easy, well of course it isn't, sunshine. It isn't supposed to be easy at all.


You're in a boat and life is a stream. Start rowing!
T___T

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