Also, these images were generated by Meta AI, because... well, what else is it good for, really?
1. Scam Altman
This is the CEO of OpenAI. And why, one might ask, is this fine fellow called "Scam"? "Sham" works just as well, but I have a certain fondness for the former because it was coined by no other than Elon Musk, who, quite fittingly, is the next entry after this one. |
| Slimy AF. |
Fairly or otherwise, Altman is widely associated with AI hype and overpromising. You say "Snake Oil Salesman" and immediately I see this guy's face in my mind.
To be fair, tech isn't just tech. A commercial angle has to exist in order to justify its existence. So having a "salesy" tech CEO isn't necessarily such an outrageous thing. It's more Altman's constant overpromising of what OpenAI can deliver, that irks people. I mean, how many times do people have to hear from this guy's mouth that AGI is coming in a few months?
2. Phony Stark
Not an instant classic unless you're also a Marvel fan. But if you are, you'd be familiar with Elon Musk's predilection for styling himself after a certain fictional genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist. |
| Space douchebag. |
Too bad all he's got is the money. The requisite charm and wit to be an actual Tony Stark is squarely in the minds of his fevered fanboys.
And let's not act like Musk didn't do his darnedest to earn that nickname. His constant cringy posturing on X, that insufferable grin and the superfluous attention-seeking antics (because if you're already the richest person on this planet, why do you need that attention?) completely nail the performative tech CEO stereotype.
Hey, if the shoe fits...
3. Zuckerborg
This made me spit-take, because both the target and the reason for the name, are instantly recognizable. |
| Cringy robot. |
Mark Zuckerberg, CEO of Meta, has long been famous for looking robotic. Which is probably unfair because he talks pretty naturally.
It all started during the Cambridge Analytica debacle, where he showed up looking less lively than a wax replica. It's almost no exaggeration to say that an entire generation was brought up on memes of Zuckerberg looking like a, well, Zuckerborg.
4. Jeff Beelzebos
Jeff Bezos, owner of tech giant Amazon, is conflated with the Devil for good reason. Which makes this one pretty clever. |
| Modern-day slave-owner. |
Bezos is infamous for Amazon's widely-criticized treatment of their warehouse workers, said to border on the inhumane. Timed bathroom breaks, unreasonable work quotas, low wages and unsafe working environments - these issues have been mostly discussed and dissected by the general public.
Come on now, if this is what you're known for in addition to being insanely rich, why wouldn't people associate you with Beelzebub?
5. Tim Crook
I'll be honest - I have no idea why former Apple CEO Tim Cook is seen as so unethical as to warrant this nickname. I looked it up. Apparently, violating antitrust conventions and using |
| Bad guy? |
I get why these would make him unpopular. Just not sure this makes him a crook. Did this guy actually break any laws? Maybe I'm the problem and I should stop interchanging the terms "crook" and "criminal".
But hey, if we're just looking for good witty nicknames, this one surely qualifies.
What's in a nickname?
There were some other options which I left out precisely because they're so obvious. I mean - calling Jeff Bezos, "Bozos". Or Mark Zuckerberg, "Zuckface". Really?! That's not witty, that's just juvenile. There's a difference.
Sticks and stones may break my bones...
T___T
T___T
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