Handle Your Imposter Syndrome

Imposter Syndrome. A curious term. It speaks, professionally, of the persistent doubt that ones current position is undeserved, that we do not have the talent to warrant what we currently have, and that one day we will be found out for the frauds that we are.

And among software developers, it's an all-too-common trope. I've struggled with it myself, and for good reason. There have been times when I doubted my own abilities as a software dev, after witnessing the rapid changes in the industry, being outright told I wasn't good enough, and so on. Sometimes interviewers tried to use it as a negotiation tactic, before tragically discovering that His Teochewness does not negotiate.

Never good enough.

I'm here today, however, not to tell you to be strong, or that you're better than you think. No, I'm going to do you one better - I'm going to explain why it doesn't matter even if your deepest darkest fears are true.

It's an unforgiving industry

First, let's establish a fact: there are probably tons of people in the industry significantly more talented and experienced than you are. (If that's not true, if you're at the top of the pile, there's no good reason for you to be reading this, so...)

Even these talented people are currently wandering around without a job thanks to layoffs in Big Tech such as Microsoft, Google and the like. The software industry is savage, man. All employers need is a hint that they don't exactly need you, and they'll be rid of you, just like that. Did these people deserve to be axed? I'd say no, but what do I know, eh?

Given the axe.

With that in mind, this is not to say that you absolutely deserve to be where you are. But statistically, if you didn't, chances are you'd already have been out of a job. Thus the chances of you at least somewhat deserving your current position, are pretty decent.

Also, let's agree that deserving to be in your position does not necessarily just mean you have the technical competence to do your job. You impressed the right people. You made the right connections. Those make you just as deserving, if not more so. Even if the interviewer at the job interview happened to be an idiot who was easily impressed, it's not like you just sat there and did jackshit.

So give yourself some credit. Not a whole lot of it, but at least just a little bit. Because my next couple points are about to annihilate everything I just said.

Deserving has nothing to do with it

You'll notice that I've been using the term "deserve" a lot. That was to help me make my earlier point - that you're not necessarily undeserving of what you have, and probably pretty deserving of it, at that. That's the good news.

The bad news is, what you think you deserve, does not matter. I've said as much previously. The world is much bigger than you and what you think you deserve, or even what you actually deserve.

Global forces
at work.

Have all the Imposter Syndrome you want. It changes nothing. You have less control over your own destiny than you think. There's certainly a lot that's within your control, but as those laid-off techies found out, there are forces beyond their ken. I'd say they deserved a lot more than what they ultimately got; but the fact is that they got what they got, and there ain't nothing me or anyone else can do about it, son. Them's the breaks. It's the way of the world.

We didn't ask for A.I to come for our jobs. We didn't cause the interest rates to fluctuate and the Big Tech company boards to jettison their headcount. We certainly didn't ask for COVID-19, which was partly what caused much of the overhiring in the first place. But it all happened; and you know what, deal with it.

No pressure

Recently, Singapore held her General Elections, and as usual, on Social Media, there was a lot of self-righteous, self-aggrandizing caterwauling about "voting wisely" and "looking at the big picture". Dear Lord, the utter cringe of it all.

Anyway, my position was this.

No doubt your vote is important. Your contribution to nation-building should be appreciated. But at the same time, buddy, you're casting a vote, not curing cancer. Sit your ass down before you give yourself a heart attack.

Not curing cancer.

I take a similar attitude to work. Is your work important? Sure it is. If it wasn't, why should anyone pay you to do it?

But at the same time, is anyone going to die because you didn't do your job properly? If so, then yes, you should take your Imposter Syndrome seriously. Otherwise...

What are the consequences of you being unqualified to do your job? Do you rescue people from burning buildings? Fly planes? Arrest violent criminals? Build bridges? Some of us do those things, yes. But for the vast majority of us, it's not that vital that you're qualified for your job, and therefore you don't need to worry too much over whether you're good enough to do it.

You won't be killing anyone with your incompetence. At most, you'll severely inconvenience some people. Or several. In other words, get over yourself.

Conclusion

The question is not whether you've earned your place. The question is really - why does it matter? It could all be gone the next day, through no real fault of your own. You don't have to deserve something in order to get it, or even keep it. Sure, it helps, but that's all it does. The world is unfair like that.

Your imposter boy for programming,
T___T